She began treatment, but soon faced many complications, including a chemo-induced blood clot on her lung. “I was in the ICU for nearly a month,” she recalls. “They weren’t sure I would make it. My first medical team was ignoring symptoms, side effects and drug interactions. The decision to move to a different oncology team was simple. I was blunt with my new oncologist ‘You’re hired. Please don’t let me die. My kids are too little.’ That started a new relationship of open communication and making sure my doctor knew all of my side effects – and addressed the ones we could.”

Today, after a double mastectomy, 38 rounds of radiation, 12 cycles of chemo, 2 pulmonary embolisms, chronic recurrent cellulitis infections and at least 15 hospital admissions, Bridget’s health is vastly improved. She’s once again exercising. She has scars, but views them as badges of courage, not something to hide. “For each scar, I have a story to tell you. Yes, I survived. And you will too. Your inner strength, faith, hope and love will help you through.”

She’s grateful for the many ways her community came together in support – from  the integrative services offered at Carol G. Simon Center (“They offered me such love, support, guidance, direction, a plan…”) to friends she barely knew (“The community at Little Village Daycare collected money and paid for a cleaning service for a year. Each week, a family took a turn cooking two meals for me. These women pulled together and I didn’t even know them. Talk about the power of love and care.”) and her incredible husband Erich (“He is a firefighter, the most amazing man ever. He lost his mother in the middle of all of it, but he stood by my side, helped me mentally, physically, emotionally. He was my solid rock to the right of me. He always did things to make me feel special and outlandish. Never made me feel sick. He faced it right there with me.”).

She’s overjoyed to be watching her kids grow up. “We’re taking time to watch sunrises together,” Bridget smiles. “At one point, the doctor sat across from me and told me that I had three weeks to live. I bought two notebooks and started writing letters to each kid, focusing on every milestone I could think of. I recorded myself reading them stories through one of those Hallmark recording books.”
Bridget lives by her favorite mantra – “Get up. Dress up. Show up and smile. If you look good, you’re going to feel good it’s that simple.” Her energy and zest for life is infectious. “Even though you’re feeling shi**y, look in the mirror, face it and say, I’ve got this. I painted on my eyebrows. I wore big earrings and red lipstick. I was really into hats. Wigs made me claustrophobic so I got hats.” Her mother would also provide comfort and shopping ideas for all kinds of hats.

But she’s never forgotten those days after diagnosis. “I tell people the raw truth. You’ll deal with unknown side effects, the sleepless nights, challenges of acclimating back into society when your treatment is over.  No Reason to minimize what happened, just raw truth that yes these things happened to me, but I channeled my energy to focus on the reason why I had to get better.  When you have a reason why, you find a way HOW. It’s that simple.”

She recommends every patient gets a notebook, encouraging them to write what they’re thinking, what they’re feeling and, most of all, five things they’re grateful for each day. “Whatever that was, acknowledge it as something that was monumental. It helps validate your feelings and provide perspective.”
When asked about the best advice she ever received, Bridget’s answer is simple, “Don’t worry about anything. It’s going to be all right.”

Going through chemo, she’d gone to an ice cream shop craving peanut butter ice cream. Just before she stepped to the counter, the clerk scraped the last of the peanutty goodness from the bucket. “As I glumly looked at the empty container, the kid next to me, with the confidence of a three year old holding a rainbow bubblegum cone, encouraged me with those words. ‘Don’t worry about anything. It’s going to be all right.’”

“Talk about ‘out of the mouths of babes,” she laughs, recalling the lightning bolt of inspiration. “Here’s this kid who knows nothing about me. But she was right. It did turn out all right.” (And the worker brought out another tub of peanut butter.)

Shortly after treatment, her mother was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer. Bridget knew all too well the journey and wanted to provide the same comfort and support as she received.  Her mom is doing well and now lives with her family.

Bridget’s focus continues to be on hope – “You have to live for now. You cannot worry about tomorrow. It’s promised to no one. When you worry, it’s like walking around with an umbrella waiting for it to rain.” Looking back at the fight she’s fought, she knows proverbial rain may fall, encouraging matches that “The sun is going to shine again. Life sucks right now. But the sun will shine again. Go do everything you want to do. Make your bucket list and check it off.”

“Before the C word, I would have never done that. Since the C word, I’ve gone to the Saratoga Springs, Lake George, Walt Disney World and have watched many sunrises in Siesta Key with good friends.”

“Remember these key profound words that STORMS always lose to the sun. “
“GET UP. DRESS UP. SHOW UP. SMILE. ”

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The day began as volunteers shared their stories, discussing challenges like recurring or metastasizing cancers, working and caring for children through treatment or facing life with lymphedema. They talked about treatments – including acupuncture, immunotherapy, bone marrow transplants, robotic surgeries and participating in clinical trials.

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Then, came the pet discussions – including tales of foster cats, a giant German shepherd and a grumpy cat named George.

“Each Support Volunteer we train is unique – some are funny or quirky or have wildly interesting hobbies. Nearly all have faced a wide range of challenges in life – some cancer related, some not,” said Cynthia Gutierrez-Bernstein, CHN’s Director of Programs. “While many matches begin with a shared diagnosis or similar treatments, we also help cancer patients and caregivers connect based on personality or lifestyle circumstances.”

The survivor volunteers share practical advice and lessons they’ve learned since their own diagnoses. “My surgeon didn’t have time to answer all of my questions, so I asked if there was a resident or medical student I could talk to,” recalled Mary Ellen.

Linda, a breast cancer survivor who has been a Member Connections volunteer since 2015, encourages patients to visit hospitals and treatment centers they’re considering. “See how you feel when you walk in,” she advises. “You have to be comfortable where you are. You wouldn’t buy a house or an apartment without a visit.”

“Cancer Support Community is pleased to partner with CHN,” said Jen Sinclair Program Director for CSCGLV.  “Our collaboration helps people move through their cancer experience with information, encouragement and confidence.”

“CSC is doing amazing work to help patients, survivors and caregivers in the Greater Lehigh Valley,” Gutierrez-Bernstein continued. “Together, we will ensure that no one faces cancer alone.”
We are pleased to welcome the following volunteers to the CHN/CSC-GLV family:

• Amanda – Breast (with recurrence to bone and organs), stage 4
• Barbara – Uterine/Bladder
• Cecelia – Uterine, stage 1B
• Dianne – Melanoma, stage 3C
• Hally – Breast, stage 2
• Katy – Acute Myeloid Leukemia (recur, FLT3+, t(6:9) mutations)
• Mary Ellen – Multiple cancers (basal, melanoma, breast cancer recurrence, thyroid), all stage 1
• Rebecca – Breast, stage 0/1
• Susanne – Breast, stage 4, Chloroma (leukemia)

ABOUT Cancer Support Community -Greater Lehigh Valley
The Cancer Support Community’s programs help people affected by cancer – survivors, caregivers, friends and family – regain control of their lives, reduce stress and isolation, and restore a sense of hope for a better quality of life regardless of the stage of the disease or the type of cancer.

About Cancer Hope Network
Cancer Hope Network provides free one-on-one emotional support to adult cancer patients and their caregivers. Each of our 400+ volunteers is at least one year post-treatment or successfully undergoing maintenance therapies. CHN Support Volunteers have faced more than 80 cancer types and speak 15 languages. They offer encouragement from diagnosis, through treatment and into survivorship.

The post Cancer Hope Network partners with Cancer Support Community GLV to train new class of volunteers. appeared first on Cancer Hope Network.

Today, Hugo and Amanda share 37 years of marriage, two daughters, two grandchildren and have another grandchild on the way. They’ve also navigated multiple cancers diagnoses, a variety of treatments and participation in several clinical trials.

A routine trip to the gynecologist in 2000 revealed a lump, which was soon confirmed as breast cancer. Within a week, Amanda had received surgery and was starting four rounds of chemotherapy and 30 days of radiation. “At the time, the information in the Internet was very limited,” Hugo, recalled.

“As a father and a husband we want to protect our family and we struggle to balance the information yet spare our family. As a husband my duty is to protect her and not only inspire confidence that everything will be ok, but also be understanding or her fears and feelings.”

“One of the hardest things was having to go home and give her bad news. After surgery, the doctor called to say that the margins weren’t clear and she needed another operation. I pulled into the driveway and heard her laughing with my brother and mother. Those who have being on this road know how difficult is to give this kind of news to the person that you love the most. But Amanda’s resiliency and love for life is awe-inspiring.”

They called on that resilience when she was diagnosed with thyroid cancer that required more surgery, iodine and radiation treatments. After treatment, they enjoyed seven happy, cancer-free years until 2011 when a checkup revealed elevated markers and testing confirmed that cancer had metastasized to her lungs. Since 2011, she’s been receiving palliative care and has participated in several clinical trials.

“As much as I want to, I cannot protect her and the girls from everything. I accept that this is our reality that every three weeks we have to go for treatment, that every three months we have to go for scans. I accept the reality of my life. What’s difficult for me is to accept that she has to go through this.”

Hugo’s advice to new caregivers is straightforward. “Don’t be afraid to admit that you’re scared. But don’t be paralyzed. Be your own advocate. Don’t ever stop telling her how much you love her and that you are going to be there for her. “

He encourages caregivers to reach out for connection. “My wife was the first person in either of our families to be diagnosed. Cancer wasn’t something people talked about. Cancer is not going to stop us from living a full life. Starting the conversation helps break down taboos.”

“I know tomorrow is not promised to any one. We must enjoy today. We can’t waste time crying for tomorrow. When this first happened, I’d always say ‘One day at a time….’

“Since she was first diagnosed back in 2000, our love for each other got stronger. We renewed our wedding vows on our 30^th anniversary, we celebrated out daughters sweet sixteens’ and weddings, we received God’s blessing in the form of two grandkids and are looking forward to meeting our third grandchild soon. All those things happened while we were living our life “One Day at a Time.”

The post Caring and loving when cancer comes back to stay. appeared first on Cancer Hope Network.